Oceanus: Chapter 10
“Let us not burthen our remembrance with A heaviness that's gone.”- William Shakespeare, The Tempest.
Chapter 1-5| Chapter 6 |Chapter 7| Chapter 8| Chapter 9|
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For almost twenty years, a small research launch, Galileo, stayed hidden inside a hangar within the western cliffs of Oceanus, never to be used again. Commissioned by the Interplanetary Science Council in 2091, the vessel had been vital in supporting planetary research across the sector. It waited, mothballed with its nose to the camouflage doors of the hangar.
No one on Oceanus knew about its existence. No one, except for Derrien Victor Smith.
Derrien had decided that no one would ever know about it, either. With the axe that he had carried from the woodshed, he approached the vessel. What stopped him from taking the first swing was not the enormity of the vessel in comparison to his human dimensions but a force that he couldn’t identify. He tried again to lift the axe. His arms were pushed back as though the ship itself was the repelling side of the magnet.
“Derrien...” A woman’s voice said softly. He gasped and held his breath. In the corner of his eye, he could see her form in the far right corner of the hangar. His heart was thudding in his ears. The grey, dullness of the concrete and her shadowed shape merged in his peripheral vision at first. He closed his eyes and shook his head, opening them again and looking to his left and then to his right. There was nobody there.
“Derrien...” The voice said again. It was in his ear and at the same time, echoing around the hangar, bouncing off the high walls. His vision blurred and his ears buzzed for a moment. He shook his head.
He tried to attack the ship again. His arms were forced away again and again each time he started afresh. “No!” He cried, his veins throbbing in his temples.
“Put it down, Derrien.” The voice was closer now. It was calm, disarming. It was Shona Lennox’s voice. “Derrien. You cannot ignore me” She said. He bowed his head in defeat. “It goes into space, Derrien. The hull can handle up to ten thousand degrees and you’re coming at it with an axe? Come on, put it down.”
“You’re not real.”
“Derrien, listen to me.”
“No, no no no” Derrien dropped the axe and began to slap his head. “No, no no.”
“Derrien, stop that.” He felt her hand touch his arm. It was the same hand he had known all those years ago. The shock of her presence vibrated through his body and made the hairs on the back of his neck stand to attention. He felt cold. “Put it down.”
“You’re not real,” he sobbed. “You can’t be.”
“I am. Derrien, I am here.” She smiled with her friendly, wide smile. Her eyes were creased either side with laugh lines. They were her eyes.
Shona Octavia Lennox, his former mentor and friend, stood before him in the hangar. When she looked up at him, her large brown eyes penetrated and touched what little was left of his soul.
“Shona?” He rubbed his eyes.
“It’s me, Derrien.” She held out a hand and touched his cheek. Her hand felt as real as Thea’s hand or Geraint’s hand. He was sure that Jet’s hand would have felt real too, had he ever felt it. Derrien’s bottom lip trembled as he tried to speak to her.
“Do you want to tell me what’s going on?” She smirked and looked up at the ship. “Just what were you doing to my ship with that tiny, flimsy axe?”
He crumpled into her arms and wept like a child, taking deep, guttural breaths. She held him there, gently shushing and stroking his head. After a time, he calmed down.
“I have to destroy it, Shona. They can’t get away.” He pulled away from her, holding back any further tears. His face was blotchy; his eyes were red.
“Who can’t get away?” She frowned.
“Anthony, Owen… The rest of them.” His voice was laced with contempt. She studied him as he paced the floor cursing them. “They all deserve to die.”
“What about those you care about?”
“Thea isn’t going anywhere. She’s safe here.” He snapped.
“And what about Jet? What about my boy, Derrien?”
Her boy. Derrien looked away. He had not thought of Jet since the incident the day before. Jet had the same, piercing eyes as his mother. They also shared thick, straight black hair and olive skin. He could barely look at Shona without seeing the young man who had been beside himself with rage just a day ago.
“Derrien, look at me.” He did as he was told.
“It has to be this way, Shona.” He looked away again.
“Does it?” She looked up at him as if searching desperately, trying to find the man she once knew. His eyes were heavy, troubled and plagued with an eternal sadness. He wore deep worry lines across his face.
“They must pay. They must.” He felt his temper rising.
“What your brother did…” She began, calmly.
“Was a crime, Shona!”
“And what you did wasn’t?” She raised an eyebrow.
Shona always knew where to hit Derrien hard. His mouth opened but no words followed. He sat down on the floor and hugged his knees. She knelt beside him and put her arm around him. “An eye for an eye, Derrien. It leaves all of us blind.”
“What have I done?”
“You sought revenge. It’s a perfectly normal response.”
“But to kill them, Shona? Am I capable of that?”
“You’re really asking me this, aren’t you?”
Derrien felt the air rapidly leave his lungs. Her words had punched him in the stomach. He was a murderer. He had never accepted it until now. “Shona, I-”
“Just kidding Derrien. I know I deserved it.” She gave him a nudge with her elbow.
“Shona. I–”
“Honestly, I understand. What I did was horrible. You did what you had to do.” She stood up and put her hands in her pockets. “What are you doing to them anyway? Just having a bit of fun?”
“I’d hardly call it fun. I feel terrible about it but at the same time, I can’t stop myself.”
Shona took a deep breath. “What they did to you was wrong but we both know that two wrongs don’t make a right.” She laughed “Sorry, I had to get in there with another proverb, didn’t I?”
“You did.” He nodded with a faint smile.
Derrien stood up again and looked up at the spacecraft parked in the hangar. “Maybe they can go home. Maybe I should go home. Who knows?”
“You don’t have to decide right now.” She stepped back and admired the vessel with her hands on her hips. “I wonder if she still fires up.”
“I can’t, Shona.”
“Maybe not today then, but you do need to get off this planet, Derrien.”She looked him in the eyes again. “Jet needs to get off this planet.”
Neither of them spoke for a few moments. Derrien, lost in thought, stared at the ship. It had been maintained by Shona and he had carried the torch in her absence. The ship could leave that day, if Derrien wished it.
“You know I did what I had to do, don’t you?” He asked sheepishly.
“I do.”
“Do you forgive me?”
“Of course I do. I was wrong.”
“You were wrong about that, yes, but you were right about the other thing.”
“I was? That’s terrible.”
“I tried to–”
“I know but we should forget about that now. We need to save them, Derrien. I don’t know how much time we have left.”
“Days, if that.”
“Come on then. Hop to it.” She nodded towards the secret entrance.
“Shona, I’ve missed you.” Derrien said as he walked away.
“I’ve missed you too.”
She faded into nothing before his eyes as he turned to give her one final glance.